Are the qualities and characteristics associated with each gender set in stone, or could they simply be basic tendencies, where there is a lot more flexibility than we currently recognize? What defines a man, and a woman, is much more subtle than most of us realize. These subtleties help us understand that our expression is indeed quite fluid and necessary, as the qualities we normally associate with each specific gender are always available to us regardless of our physical form. The implication is that we are not limited or confined by any particular set of characteristics because of our gender, but must express both in order to understand ourselves more completely. What may be even more important to realize is that the expected behavior of each gender is not based on anything factual or permanent, but mostly based on the attributes we have given them. What we expect a man and woman to exhibit is somewhat arbitrary and due to a limited understanding of whom we actually are and what we are capable of. The ultimate goal for all of us is to experience ourselves as whole and complete. This is what we strive to become. Let’s take a look.
Natural Tendencies
The physical differences between the genders are readily apparent and are designed for specific purposes. We can all understand that. The more subtle differences are really about how energy is expressed within the form of a man or woman. As a general rule, the man is more assertive, and has a natural tendency to have an outward expression in the world through action. They are typically most comfortable residing in their minds, where things can be separated and analyzed. The expression of a woman is more about being receptive and relating to the world through feelings. This feeling nature allows for a more wholistic perception of life and the world. Their experience is generally more emotional. It’s important to understand, however, that these subtle differences in expression are only broad tendencies. It is not required of us to view them as boundaries of which we must adhere to as defined by society. Why is this important to understand? When we overly identify ourselves with our gender, we cut ourselves off from half of our available expression. This would be a mistake, for we need both sets of qualities or characteristics in order to be truly successful in our life. Both expressions are necessary, and neither is better nor more important than the other. The man is able to be receptive, listen and feel. The woman is able to be assertive and take action when it is warranted. We are human beings first, after all, and this implies that we are all things.
Looking in a Mirror
Humanity has a dual expression, as we can see. The “battle between the sexes” is something we are still trying to heal and understand. It is the relationships we have in our lives that will help us do just that. Our significant other provides us the opportunity to understand ourselves. This relationship is not intended to emphasize the differences between our gender, but to see what we have inside us as well. Our partner is a mirror to show us who we essentially are. We are creating a battle that does not exist in reality. Our difficulties arise with our unwillingness to view ourselves in others. The answer is simple, you see. The battle is within.
The Complete Human Being
Are the differences between the genders still significant enough to create problems for us? Unfortunately, yes. The good news is that we have come a long way and are finally getting somewhere through a better understanding of ourselves. It is the extreme expression of what we believe to be a man and a woman that creates the challenges. If we honestly look at our history, we can see that our identification with gender is becoming more modified with each successive generation, and this is a good thing. We are moving into the center of our expression as a human being, and this can only bring us more peace. Our inner being is one of fluidity, and it is this fluid expression that allows us to become the complete human being we seek. It would be a mistake, therefore, to view the opposite sex, or any other person as the enemy, for they are simply here to show us who we already are. Resentment will only lead to a continued sense of separation. This is what we are healing. We must also include our fellow gay and transgender persons in this awareness as well, and realize that each of us has a longing to be complete and whole. This is our common ground. We are in the process of realizing ourselves as human first. Every quality, characteristic, and identification after that is far less important. What makes us the same is our heart. Our ability to love will render our temporary differences meaningless.
All my love and support, stay safe and be well