The pressure we often feel when making decisions is mostly due to our own egos. In other words, we pressure ourselves. The reality is that, although we do eventually need to get moving and make a decision, there really is no rush. We all want to make the “right” choice, so we must allow ourselves the appropriate amount of time to weigh things out before we move forward. There is always an element of fear that we need to overcome in order to continue with our process. This is the emotional part of our experience. Our emotions are indeed an integral part of our lives, for we are feeling, sentient beings. It’s important for us to understand, however, that when we engage in our decision-making process, our feelings are not necessarily our friends. As you may recall, our feelings or emotions are always in a state of flux and are therefore not very reliable because they change so rapidly. What we are looking for when making decisions is a more stable place. It is in our minds where we can find this. Our mind contains within it the ability to rise above our feelings and gain that necessary objectivity that is required in order to make good decisions. I think we can all recognize that the decision-making process isn’t an easy one. Fortunately, we have a great tool available to help us out. It’s called “The Three-Day Rule”. Let’s take a look.
Ultimately, there is no such thing as a wrong decision. What we need to keep in mind, however, is that we can avoid some undesirable or unpleasant experiences that may follow our decision by considering potential outcomes before we finalize our decision. Yes, there is no way to know for sure what our choices and decisions will bring us, but we do need to give ourselves time to be as clear and precise as we can be. The “Three Day Rule” provides us with this opportunity. Basically, this principle suggests that we need to wait three days before we take any action regarding our decisions. In essence, we are giving the time necessary to let whatever feelings we have either subside or at least become clarified before we proceed. This is very important, because if we’re impulsive, we may all of a sudden find ourselves involved with something we did not intend. Nobody wants that! When we are overly emotional, it is not the time to take any action. Take a deep breath and pull back. We’re also aware that bigger decisions that affect a long period of our life need to be given a lot of consideration. The same applies to smaller, less impactful decisions as well, even though their impact may be short-term. If something doesn’t feel right, we need to wait. If we’re feeling insecure or doubtful, we need to wait. Our goal is to not allow our ego to impel us to immediate action, no matter what is involved. It’s difficult to tell ourselves no or that we have to wait, isn’t it? By saying no, we’re simply giving ourselves time. Wait three days before making up your mind about anything. With a little practice, you may notice that you feel entirely different, even overnight. This is a good thing. When our feelings have subsided, we’re in a better position to think clearly and decide more appropriately. One of the greatest pitfalls we experience as human beings is that of instant gratification. Our challenge is whether we want to create something sooner and have it not been what we really want, or be patient and manifest what we do really want. The choice is always ours. There is no rush! There are a couple of areas where we have a tendency to get into trouble and make decisions or take action prematurely. Let’s consider them.
We’re Excited
It feels really good to be excited, doesn’t it? Unfortunately, we often believe that because something feels good, it must be good for us. Clearly, this is not always the case. We can get into trouble just as easily by making decisions and taking actions from a place of excitement as from fear and confusion. These are still emotions you see. Our goal as human beings is to be able to access our minds, for this is where we create our lives. Our feelings are part of the creative process, but they are not the creative process itself. This can only be found in the mind. This is where we have a sense of objectivity and thoughtfulness. In order to be truly successful in life, this is the place we need to go. If we allow our feelings to dictate our decisions and actions, we’ll never get there. At the very least, we won’t create what we truly intend to create. Even though we have good feelings of excitement then, we still need to wait just a bit before we proceed. Wait the three days and see if you still feel excited. Chances are, these feelings have at least lessened, or maybe other choices and possibilities have presented themselves. You see, there’s a lot to consider. Feelings of excitement are a key area for our egos to become involved and impel us toward some immediate action. Even though it feels good, we may need to take a step back.
We’re Upset
In our daily interactions with others, it’s likely that someone will say something or do something that upsets us. It’s certainly unpleasant to be hurt by another. These are the times that present us with the most opportunity for growth and self-constraint. If we remind ourselves that feelings are temporary, we give ourselves time to make a different choice. Let the anger and hurt subside before you respond. It’s only our ego telling us we need to respond immediately. For example, did you know that you can simply walk away? Many of us forget about this option. Walking away is often the most powerful response we can give. We have lost nothing by doing so. Don’t hurt back, for this will not help the other person, nor will it help you feel any better. “No action” is “loving action” in many cases. Again, remember the three-day rule. Sleep on it, give yourself some time. Nine times out of ten, no action will be required, believe it or not. After the waiting period, we may find that things need to be addressed more directly, and that’s OK. Just keep in mind that attacking another is not the correct way. Our feelings are our own responsibility. Nobody can make us feel anything. We are loving, understanding, and compassionate by our very nature!
We’re Afraid
Creating something new in our life is a scary prospect for sure. Honestly, the only obstacle we face is fear of the unknown. If we want a better life, we’re going to have to take some risks, or we’ll never know. It is absolutely essential we take adequate time to consider the various aspects of our choices, but we cannot remain there forever. We need to challenge ourselves and be open to new experiences. This is how we grow. New experiences are just that, new. There is no way for us to know the why, what, and how beforehand. Indecision creates a whirlpool of self-doubt, eventually leading to despair. If a river becomes obstructed, it will destroy everything around it at some point. The goal then is to always keep the energy moving. If you are unable to make a decision in one area of life, put it on hold and focus on another area. There is always something we can do to get unstuck. We cannot make the wrong decision with new experiences, so jump off! Life will catch you!
Take the time to be thoughtful in all that you do. Generally speaking, our minds will provide the best answers for us eventually. Don’t always be guided by your feelings alone. With practice, we find the appropriate balance. The “Three Day Rule” gives us the time we need, but we must exercise it. Feelings come and go, but our minds allow us to see the bigger picture. From here we can find the things that are realistic and sustainable. There is no right or wrong decision. If we don’t like the experiences our choices bring us, there’s a whole list of better choices and options available to us always. The only mistake we could possibly make is to choose the same thing over and over again, expecting a different result. Make a different selection!
All my love and support, stay safe and be well